It’s my last night at home before my op – assuming that it does go ahead tomorrow as planned. Before my first replacement I had a feeling that it would be postponed and I was right – and I’ve the same feeling again this time. Because of this I’m strangely calm – which I suppose is good as if I allowed myself to believe it will happen tomorrow then I’d be a total wreck. Some people tell me that it will be easier second time as I know what to expect but sometimes I think that ignorance is bliss. I’d give anything NOT to know about all the struggles and frustration that lie ahead in the next few weeks and I’m not sure whether I’m ready to face the Grumpy Cow again. 

I feel sorry for Steve who has to live with me and help me as I recover, so I will try not to be an impatient patient and hopefully my recovery will be less traumatic second time round, although as it’s my dominant arm I’m expecting things to be much more difficult. My left arm is still sore but whether it is due to the fibromyalgia or past surgery I’m unable to say but I hope that the surgeon may be able to help me with this tomorrow.

I need to be at hospital by 7.30am so I’ll be up pretty early, I only hope that I manage to get some sleep. I will update this blog as soon as I know what’s happening – if the surgery goes ahead then blog posts will be very short for a while. Goodnight all x